In Memory of Dear Mother

 

My mother was so dear in so many ways.

Her gentle and loving manner the

background music of my growing life.

She gave comfort and dried my tears,

suggested activities and calmed fears.

She was the light of her church too,

helping in many and various ways.

Lifted spirits with her gentle presence,

left a vast hole with her absence.

Her pleasant and loving manner lifted

me out of many a morose moment.

Sweet composure shattered by a crack,

moved to tears and asking why humility.

When I was sick she mopped my brow,

felt for a fever and decreased my ill feelings.

Got out a vaporizer and soothed the lungs,

brought me an aspirin and water and love.

Gone 41 years now, always remembered.

I was pleased to be around her,

privileged to live with her,

Fortunate to come from her,

still think of and miss her,

my dearest and loving mother.

Invisible God

 

The only supreme power proven by science?

it guides our every movement,

controls our forward motion,

makes inevitable our slips and falls.

Controls our movement,

influences our sleep,

growth, exertions and ambitions.

Gravity holds control over every situation,

exerts pull on every swing, shot, tackle,

kick, hit, lunge or leap.

Pray to that which you cannot see,

but controls every facet of destiny?

Pray to the almighty Gravity,

whose particles we cannot find

but mathematically surmise.

Does Gravity have an anti counterpart?

They think so, in dark matter.

But no one is 100 % sure...

We have never seen the devil particle.

Around these parts the god-king gravity holds sway,

defy it and you may hit the ground with little delay!

nevertheless enjoy your weekend, endure your weekday.

Modern Zoological Mythology

 

This time of year the animal kingdoms go to war.

Armies human (and otherwise) face off on gridirons;

Wild Cowboys shoot it out with crazed idigenous Chiefs,

Angry Vikings storm the field, attack Patriots with pigskins.

Wild Dolphins attack befuddled Bears, out of their depth…

The Ravens peck at the Titans, blinding them at the passes.

Those Seahawks flap all around and disorient the Lions,

while the Buccaneers threaten to deep-six the Buffalo Bills.

The Bengals pounce and bite the 49’ers!

The Commanders just can’t tame those Broncos,

while the Cardinals swarm around the Jets.

The Saints charge the Chargers, while

The Panthers sink fangs into the Rams,

and those Jaguars jump all over the Steelers.

They all try to send the Packers packing...

Which wild horde will win the Super Bowl?

Just keep watching and you will find out,

if the commercials don’t drive you crazy.

If all those creatures were real live stock,

the bloodstains on the field would be a

biologist’s dream, or naturalist’s nightmare.

Alas, only human blood will be spilled,

and hopefully in very small quantities!

So pick your animal or inanimate object to cheer,

and hope they win the top spot in this upcoming year.

The advertisers will have the last hurrahs,

we may be hung over and feel the blahs.

Seven months until we get to do it all over again!

Weather Finally Turned

 

The warm sunny days stretched taut into November,

Enjoyable but in suspense waiting for the inevitable

snap back into cold, wet weather that should be here.

Today was the break, rain and cold rushed into the void!

Time to stay inside and line the nest with insulation,

make sure the cupboards and fridge are well-stocked.

Eat a hot dish of something and snuggle up to Netflix,

but keep a tenuous link to the outside via text messages.

We know what awaits us as dark thirty settles over the city,

Not just gloom but bright cheerful holiday celebrations.

And we feel, or at least hope, to win through to eventual spring;

Glad in our minds for good meals and cherished friendships.

We cruise up to and through another autumn season,

summer could not obliterate the cold weather pleasures.

Forget hot sweaty hikes around crowded pedestrian trails,

Leap into glittering powder, and enjoy some winter thrills!

here it is 2022

 

...and I just finished a book about WWI,

events and people leading up to 1914.

Television shows programs from the 1950’s

all the way up to the present season;

Time becomes more fluid every day.

One can go to video sites online,

find film clips from almost anytime,

from the first shorts of 1890’s up

to news clips that were made this morning.

With all this time travel are we any wiser?

One celebrity threatens war on the Jews,

another with multiple companies swoops in

and buys a social media biggie for 44 billion.

How much hatred or ownership is enough?

Interesting to watch them push the limits.

East and West are lined up hard,

cold steel and hot electronics poised

to destroy civilization all over again.

Blame is cast, and doubt, and fear too.

We never seem to learn the lesson

that war solves nothing, in the end.

Technology lurches forward,

surprising some, delighting others.

Human wetware tries to keep up

with all these clever tools excreted.

No replacements for compassion,

caring, loving peace – that we

desire for our loved ones.

In a world that shifts so chaotic,

the gift of caring for each other

is perhaps the most powerful thing

we can hold onto.

The Foliage Looks Skinny

 

But any lack of water could mislead someone

These woods are bulging, saturated, pregnant.

You would not think that to look at them,

spindly limbs swallowed by color and sunlight.

So many people hike through these woods,

on the main trail and the side ones that wind

through brush and around huge oaks and elms.

Most hike alone, lost in thoughts, trailing

fragments of emotion that radiate from them.

Their relationships mired in complexities,

the loneliness of so many searchers;

people not recognizing what a gift solitude is,

accompanied by trees and bushes that do not

condemn, nitpick, complain, gossip, or lie.

So many humans walking off their angst,

running down their frustrations to the paved trail,

shedding sweat and emotions that range the gamut.

Happiness, mirth, contentment, sadness, anger,

bitterness, hatred, determination, ambition, hope…

The trees ought to topple with all of that weight

of emotives from thousands of walkers,

runners, bikers and everyone else moving along.

The shrubbery ought to sag down to the ground,

would if human emotions weighed as much as snow!

So the heavily laden wooded areas struggle on,

sprouting new leaves and wildflowers with

every miraculous springtime –

Despite the constant littering, spitting, cursing,

sweating, grunting and yes, emoting human hordes

that trample through almost every day, regardless

of weather or any kind of ecological concern.

It is amazing that anything is left standing at all,

besides human-constructed edifices,

emotional or material.

Retire That Tire

 

So down the freeway I cruised at proper speed,

the other drivers were maintaining theirs as well;

afternoon sunlight in our eyes made us cautious,

and a good thing with what happened dead ahead!

Suddenly a delivery van in front swerved hard,

shuddered to a stop, missing the left front tire.

That tire bounded out into lanes including mine,

caused me to swerve to miss the rolling menace.

I missed it, or it missed me, and I sped on ahead,

glancing in the rearview at instant mayhem behind…

Cars swerving and slowing, dodging that rubber rascal.

How does a tire just keep going and going like that?

Was so relieved to exit the nervy freeway finally.

I hope no other driver got impacted negatively

by that absurd situation, more common than realized.

Tonight when chasing sleep I won’t count sheep,

rather bouncing tires hopping steel highway fences...

Somehow that will not make me sleep much easier.

The Day that the Earth Will Regret

 

Nuclear warfighting exercises occur,

drones rain down on Ukrainian cities.

Could this conflict be just the first stage?

The clouds of war continue to accrete,

even as drought hits around the world.

We stupid humans are at it again,

attacking and destroying each other

with maniacal abandon.

After so many bloody conflicts in the 20^th

century, we populate the 21^st with death.

It seems we really do need a

Klattu and his robot to

enforce a worldwide peace.

Like “The Day the Earth Stood Still,”

delivering an ultimatum:

‘Abandon your destructive ways,

or be destroyed by an even greater force.’

Might always makes right? No,

but in our case,

drastic measures may be needed.

No laughing matter,

nuclear war or its aftermath.

Getting to feel a lot like 1913 or 1938

 around here these days.

Enjoy life while you (we) can!

Autumn in Iowa

 

Some leaves will wave a bright ‘Yellow!’ in greeting;

others may cry ‘Red!’ to warn of winter coming.

Variety of tree reflections illuminated by slanting

sunlight makes walks pleasant, and drives hazardous!

That low sun can dazzle the eyes in unhappy ways.

Yet the crisp air and smell of leaves lifts excitements,

reminds one of homecoming, football, bonfires, parties.

Time to get out and enjoy life before the gloom creeps in!

November will have its own highlights and lowlights;

The Thanksgiving feast will make amends with darkness,

and kick off another holiday season – more parties!

Christmas shopping and eating excesses accompany

the bitter cold and blowing snow and ice crystals.

Another year turns on that big wheel of time,

but October sunshine can make a day feel fine.

Arise American Cities

 

Your central plazas have been all rebuilt,

sculpture gardens rest where factories once sat.

Spraying fountains refresh a weary populace,

Local festivals offer respite from busy work schedules.

Empty warehouses repurposed into lofts,

Railways renewing transportation in major centers.

Historic buildings refashioned into restaurants and museums,

a new vibrancy has replaced decaying prospects.

The new USA looks different from the old USA,

and not in such a bad way after all.

Commerce and entertainment continue unabated,

marketing carrying new intents, wearing a new skin.

Your grandparents downtown’s have been transformed,

your parents retail establishments reoriented.

Internet-integrated operations ping our smartphones

with special offers and coupon reminders.

Youthful nights out have been altered,

but they are no less exciting, or intoxicating.

Rides, food and gaming summoned by taps,

we live like the lesser gods of yesteryear

with none of their difficulties or dangers.

Arise American cities, and celebrate your victories;

you have overcome the past and light the way to the future!

Despite some annoyances that linger, like overseas conflict

or the din of continuous construction here at home.

Unceasing changes will not dim most future hopes,

our metropolises will continue to glow in transformation.

They Never Stop Trying

 

“Sorry to see you go!

We tried so hard with you…

So you are no longer with us?

I’m humbly asking…

I’m begging you, Mike!

Without your help, all is lost.

So you finally gave up on us.

We never gave up on you!”

The fundraising appeals never stop,

they know my pointer hovers over “Delete”

have only seconds to grab my attention –

tug my heartstrings,

yank my guilt tendons hard.

I’ve seen them all so many times before,

I rarely hesitate to wipe them off with one click.

And yet I still need to read each one,

however briefly,

to see if it is a “real” email from a friend or loved one.

So much time used up nowadays to scan electronic media,

so many devices to siphon off our precious minutes and hours,

the one thing they can’t make any more of, even in China.

But what can one do? Go back to 1964?

I don’t think so.

I hear another bleeble – where is that damned phone now?

(Your time spent reading this blog rant is deeply appreciated)

Stonk Market Haibun

 

Some upstart game company is about to go broke, the stock tanks. But wait! A bunch of bloggers decide it looks sexy, place buy orders. Stock value soars. More jump on the bandwagon. Pundits yell “sell!” the buying frenzy just expands and explodes. A few fortunes are made. Time for an intervention by the market makers, those god-demons of finance. They do so, and the value melts away like butter on lava. Many lose a fortune. Just another scenario in that insane, rampaging beast known as the securities market. Stocks, bonds, derivatives, hopes, dreams, greed and fear. Each new generation will learn the hard way. Savings accounts rule – securities markets are for fools.

Just one opinion,

it is your money to lose;

Go get em tiger!

Two Haibun

 

A sunlit morning along a wooded path full of greenery. A placid river reflecting clouds and trees. Lonely heron swoops down and lands, walks some, takes off again, disturbing the water. There I am, taking it all in as I walk the trail. Then I see a grassy path ahead, and take it to a small sandy beach. Walk out and snap photos of the calm water reflecting life. A black dog appears out of nowhere, and snuffles up to me. I hear a voice call out, and turn to see a woman, Tall, slender and ponytailed, she greets me and I return the wave. We talk about the dog, she throws sticks into the river and Bubba runs out into the river to fetch them. We thus share a small but delightful moment on a gorgeous fall morning. When I return along the trail, I feel enriched.

A sunlit morning

Black dog leaps into river

splashing consciousness

Infinity sits in the middle and knows, humans dance around in a ring and suppose. We draw geometric globes and inside out spheres, theorize about galaxies and stars. Energies reach total entropy, then come right back to form apples again. In the mental world of theory, the infinite is just another human cipher, we make infinity our b**ch, like we do everything else. Perhaps humans are god, infinite, life in an ultimate expression. But we will not be here forever. Our bodies, or lives, our nations and alliances are not infinite. Our concept of infinite is finite – only lasts as long as our brains still function. Yet within our finite minds, infinity goes on forever. Until the last human turns to dust, then it cannot be expressed in symbolic form. But it will still go on – forever and ever.

Another math show

blows this bystander’s mind

infinite pleasure

Three Line Emotes

 

the sun rises late,

flowers cram in that last bloom 

almost October

summer memories

flutter like last butterflies

fall is marching in

new resolutions

enter with a new season

as sunlight fades out

The Queen is Dead

 

Long live the King.

A dynasty continues,

royalty perpetuated.

The scepter is passed on.

Primer Ministers come and go,

Labor and Tories do the same.

Regents will stick around longer,

but, being human, they die too.

So much history is recounted,

and many public tears are shed;

some “good riddance” muttered too,

Then life and Royal Houses go on.

We say we want democracy,

yet some tolerate dictatorships,

and we lament passing royalty –

while ruled by corporate oligarchies.

Humans – humph!

How long will it takes us all to be

relegated to the “dustbin of history?”

Only for some succeeding entity to know.

Age and time

 

Got the hair dyed brown again today,

now youthful for another month or two.

Took a walk with another sexagenarian,

compared places we have been and seen.

The days rush on by in pleasant fashion,

one certainly cannot complain too much;

Must remember to practice compassion,

with all health and good fortune present.

Watching young Spaniards cavort on TV,

wondering if things are really that casual

these days – freewheeling hookups and fun.

A respite from disappointing looks in the mirror.

Health and mobility, outdoors and fresh air

reassure me that good times are still in store.

Choose Peace

 

China can keep a 6-million man army fully supplied. 

 Their navy is huge and growing. 

 Their air force is expanding, 

gaining parity with the US and Russia.

They are now a very formidable foe. 

We can’t tell them what to do.

We can’t bully them into submission.

They would never give in in any case.

They are a colossus among nations now.

China is flexing its economic might,

Russian military keeps expanding;

Britain is beating the war drums,

threatening war with Russia !?!

The US keeps spending exponentially more on defense...

Poor Taiwan – right in the crosshairs!

Is it worth it to the US to get into a huge

brawl with China over some island nation?

Knowing us we will in any case -

it is what we do.

Pulling stupidity out of wisdom;

We seem to do it at least once a decade.

These trends really don’t look good,

The world seems spoiling for a fight.

Cliche-laden as this may be,

the facts stare us in the face,

the facts do not lie.

If the world won’t slow this mad rush to war,

how many millions more will die?

Belief in warfare brings on more war,

belief in peace brings on more peace.

We should believe in peace -

it costs less and is healthier for humankind!

Made It!

 

It is a cool, sunny Wednesday morning,

in the summertime – glorious,

water landscapes shimmer with beauty,

and I ride my bicycle through it all.

For I managed to escape the tyranny of

a regular workday, lived long enough

to cross that imaginary finish line,

to retirement and doing whatever I wish -

and getting a social security check in return.

Sometimes I pinch myself to see if I’m awake,

other times I chafe at little frustrations –

then remind myself what I have accomplished,

and how many before me who did not make it.

Thank goodness for retirement – Hurrah!

The Small Enjoyments

 

I meet a longtime friend at the food line,

barefoot myself as he requested – he always is.

It is a beautiful summer day, and we chat as we wait.

Soon, the providers make an announcement and prayer,

then the chow line begins its crawl.

Time passes swift, my feet enjoy the cool surfaces,

my mind enjoying conversation with casual acquaintances.

Soon and sudden, my turn is here:

“Ham, Turkey or Vegetarian?”

“Turkey,” I reply, in the middle of a sentence.

We get our dual lunch sacks packed with sandwiches,

chips, applesauce, cookies and love.

Then move to a shady sidewalk along the church

building, to eat and chat and gripe about the state of the world.

Twelve becomes one, and then it is time to go.

I pack the rest of the food, most of it, back into the sack,

and walk my friends back to their car.

They take off after a couple final hugs,

and soon, so do I.

Every Monday should be this pleasant.

Relationships - Fictional and Real

 

Watching a new series on Netflix,

all about professional gay relationships.

Well to do guys going through all of

their turbulent relationships, dropping one,

starting another, having one-nighters after a

seventeen-year relationship ends.

It bears little resemblance to my life,

but there are impressions and things

I pick up that can be useful.

Perhaps I should try a new approach.

A dating service?

A hookup service like the big “G” ?

So it causes me to re-tread familiar ground,

and re-try the connection sites.

Then I come to the same conclusion I reached before,

and go back to my old ways - the ones that work.

Sigh

Some things never change.

Idealized gay romantic comedies,

and personal pathways pursued over and over.

Perhaps our fate is all predestined,

etched beforehand in some subatomic

universal pattern of gay wretchedness,

or maybe gay happiness.

Nothing else to do but live it out and see

where it all leads.

Images Thrown Together Over Time

 

Can I see beauty in something others mock?

Incrementing patterns, images of description.

We are conscious, count up and down, study

our own creativity, never fully comprehending

why or how we can come up with so many ways to

thrill, or to kill.

When boredom sets in, we can begin again.

When we deem something a failure, we begin again.

When we are rejected or denied,

we redirect and begin again.

To leave behind an elegant creation,

a stunning or shocking image,

a fad that catches on,

we have certainly left our mark.

But so have murderers and dictators.

They all, we all, become part of the blended

human mix of putrescent beauty and glory -

Entropy expressed in galleries, libraries, trash dumps...

1900

1914

1921

1929

1939

1945

1952

1999

2001

2005

2008

2015

Meaningful, important, serious things have happened in every single year.

Anything impacting a single human life with intensity makes that year special to

that human being – and who are the rest of us to disagree or deny that meaning to that person?

Waves cover over bubbling water and the surge of years, submergence of fears, realization of joys.

Someday it will all end, perhaps to begin all over again.

Driving Human Nature

 

If you ever want to see raw human nature,

in live action, real-time selfishness in full…

drive on any freeway during rush hour.

Cars, trucks and SUV’s jockey for position,

people surging ahead and cutting other off,

slowing and speeding, tailgating and swerving.

The whole stream of cars become something alive,

writhing, steaming, slithering slowly south (or wherever).

Me right in the middle of it all,

no better or worse than any piece of

human wetware controlling a wheel and pedals.

When it slows to a crawl,

I curse myself, everyone else, the human race,

wonder why we have so many cars and people;

irrational or one-sided thoughts parade in a

stream of frustration inside that parallels the

stream of luckless vehicles outside my window.

Then, glimmers of hope emerge...

The line speeds up, seedometer needle goes from 5 to 10, 15

to 20, 30 and on up to 60-ish.

Ahhh, now that is more like it!

The mood lightens,

prospects suddenly become more cheerful.

My driving can resume semi-automatic,

as my mind jumps ahead to evening and weekend plans.

Just in case, I utter a little prayer:

“Please, no more traffic jams before I get home.”

Because I don’t care about after -

I’m a selfish POS just like everyone else out on the road.

See you out there one of these days :-)

Topsy-Turvy

 

You’re up until you’re down,

You’re in until you’re out;

One group thinks you are A-OK,

but then another thinks you stink.

Popularity is a flickering wave

in a turbulent ocean of human desires.

Got to focus in and ride that crest,

then fade back deep for perspective …

sooner or later you’ll fall flat on your face.

Must needs to shift to some other mental place.

Thank goodness for the refuges from the game,

where we are not endlessly pursuing fame,

rating each other up and down and sideways…

Time to get out in nature and take a walk,

leaving every single device owned behind at home.

Finale Balance

 

Mow and weed,

scrape and paint;

strenuous indeed,

not for the faint.

Retirement was supposed to be easy,

all travel and pleasure and fun.

Not perched on a ladder feeling queasy,

Pushing through painting until done.

But there is a balance that can be found,

between entertainment and needed projects.

Some time invested in tasks profound,

then allow relaxation to pause and reflect.

There will be time enough for future entertainment,

while I gift myself with some needed goal attainment.

Crossing the Finish Line

 

Hoping to thrive after turning 65,

hereby declaring my retirement.

Memories of past jobs gone by,

Forced into situations and adjustments.

Started out in a high tech industry,

But forced by circumstances to go low.

Thought I would do so much,

money ideas flowed like water.

But here I am retired,

moving more like molasses.

Still getting projects done,

one by one,

slow and steady completions,

as the days crawl by,

and yet time still flies.

Maybe some travel will help my mood,

now suspended by strangeness

and disbelief.

How did I get all the way to 65?

And why do I still feel like 23 inside.

Questions, questions, questions.

Never too old to ask,

or be baffled by a lack of answers.